When the music's over

 The man I loved is dead.  What's worse is he died a month ago and I just found out.  I don't know what happened or how and no one told me, I saw a post by a mutual friend that mentioned it in passing.  

Harry wasn't mine, I was a side chic and I hadn't even seen him this year, except maybe once in late winter or early spring.  We talked every now and then. The last time was in July, and he said he wanted to wait to see me until I was cleared by the doctor for sex, cause he would want to have sex.  Not that he was supposed to be having sex anyway.  He had to set his live in gf to have sex with someone else, cause he wasn't.  She didn't share our kinks,  he was into domination and ropes and she , at least as far as he told me was not.

At the beginning I was not interested in falling in love.  I was in fact determined that I was not going to give my heart away again. ever. Then little by little he wormed his way in, until one day I realized, I didn't want to lose him, that in fact I wanted him to be in my life and world forever, and that if the only way I could have that was to be his other chic, it would be enough for me.